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Discipline or delusions? A non-alcoholic story

Why did I come up with this thought? Why did I decide to do it?  And most of all, why is it so hard? Those were common thoughts of mine just one month ago. I had decided to not smoke and drink for a month. Those first days were terrible, I felt like an addict regarding how much I was craving a glass of wine.  I sniffed the alcoholic beverages of others, I peeked longingly into pubs and I walked past the alcoholic-aile in the supermarket with a visibly sad pout.

Ok… Maybe I was being a little dramatic… But it felt hard! Until it didn’t. I cannot put my finger on the exact moment it happened, but after a while it stopped feeling horrible, I even stopped thinking about it. Ordering a 0,0% white beer or a radler became something normal and then I realised I was already at the end of the month.

‘I could do this for another month easily.’ I said in my uncle’s car three days before the deadline. ‘Or…’ My uncle said, ‘…you just think you can because you’re almost done.’ Yeah, he had a point there. Plus, how would I know for sure? Well, my deadline had passed for 5 days, still no alcohol. I would have thought that when my boyfriend brought me that bottle of red wine the first of April that I would have opened and emptied the whole thing that same evening, but I didn’t! Yay! I’m not an addict!

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However, I did open it two days ago and I… emptied it. Completely. My god it was delicious. Let’s conclude that I shouldn’t open a bottle of wine by myself at home.

Today is my birthday and I will celebrate tomorrow with a little get together. Ofcourse there will be alcohol, but I promise I will drink one big glass of water between each glass of wine, not only to keep myself hydrated but also to lower the drinking rate, After all, when I’m drinking water, I’m not drinking wine.

So, why haven’t you read anything about the smoking yet? The explanation is simple, there isn’t much to tell. Coincidentally, I only feel the desire to smoke when I have had some alcohol, resulting in the completion of a very simple part of this goal.

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All in all it has been a good experience for me. I am really proud of my achievement and I really showed myself that I am able to discipline myself in a way I didn’t think I was capable of. It will be good for me to keep setting these little goals for myself regarding the addictive substances in life. I am young, so I don’t want to quit them completely, but since I am not very good at moderation, I will need the little goals to keep feeling good about myself. I am very happy I decided to complete this goal!

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